Paper Monitor: Right on song
It's getting to that time of the year. Christmas parties = karaoke.
In the wake of the charity version of Livin' On A Prayer featuring Jon Bon Jovi, Taylor Swift and Prince William on a stage in London, the Times's rock and pop critic Will Hodgkinson offers his top-10 karaoke songs for the wannabe stars of the office.
Paper Monitor's vocal chords have already been limbering up in anticipation of the Xmas bash, so this list is timely.
As Hodgkinson points out in his No 8 choice - Kids by MGMT - "It's not easy to combine karaoke with being cool". But he includes this "hipster's anthem" because it is too "joyful to resist". He suggests that you get your "little nephew to hum the wibbly synth bit". Your nephew won't be at the office shindig, of course, but maybe include the company MD.
No 7 is Walk This Way by Run-DMC, which is described as the "most dad-friendly rap-rock stomp of all time" - and only advisable after a "few pints of London Pride".
Paper Monitor's favourite of Hodgkinson's suggestion is this - I Will Survive, by Gloria Gaynor. It's a must, he says, if, "you've lost your Oyster card, your hair is refusing to co-operate and you just caught your boyfriend in the store cupboard with Lesley from HR."
Picking the perfect karaoke song requires quite a lot of thought. Stepping up to the mic could bring you some kind of infamy among your office compadres - make sure it's for the right reason.
Radiohead's Creep might best be avoided - people might take you literally.
So here's what Paper Monitor will be performing this yuletide - Kings of Leon's Sex on Fire.