Stories

Grief: your thoughts, stories and experiences

Ryan and India by river

Last week at Like Minds we made a film about one of those things in life that we will all experience - grief. It feels awful, it's different for everyone and it's certainly not something you have to "get over". We wanted to make talking about grief a little easier.

You shared the film with your family and friends and you told us your stories about grief. The comments you left on the BBC Stories' social media pages were brave, sometimes painful and moving. We thought they deserved to be shared - thank you for telling us your stories and hopefully they'll help others going through the same thing.

You can can catch up on all the BBC Like Minds' films including the film about grief on BBC iPlayer.

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Grief doesn't shrink away and get smaller but your heart grows bigger to help you cope. If you feel sad, be sad but talk to someone. Don't bottle up your feelings. Caroline

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As a nurse I had sat with a lot of dying patients but I was not ready for my sister to die. I will never get over it and I cry every day. Life does go on, it has to. And I have a lovely friend who lets me cry. She has suffered the loss of her son and we share a lot. Jacqui

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If there's one video you watch on Facebook today, let it be this one. Whether you have lost somebody or not, this is such an important video to help you understand grief. Nothing in life can prepare anyone when they lose a loved one. So please let people know you're there. This can be as simple as sending them a text to inviting them round for coffee. Don't let bereavement and grief be something that is not discussed! Jenna

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In the space of six years, I lost my mum, nan and brother - all unexpectedly. What I've come to realise is that grief is not a one way process. You can be fine for ages then suddenly have a day when the tears won't stop. Dawn

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Thank you so much for your video. I lost my husband just over 17 months ago and some days are pretty grim, but other days are pretty good. Liz

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I lost my 26 year old daughter 17 months ago, the stages went out the window almost at stage one. However, the hardest thing I've had to endure is people putting up photos of my daughter on social media sites like my loss is not important and it's all about them. Their actions certainly affected the early months of my grief. Angela

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My beautiful wife died two years ago. The fun and support of a wonderful facebook group of fellow widows/widowers and my ability to only allow small thoughts when I'm feeling vulnerable, then bigger thoughts when I feel strong, have helped me through so far! An acceptance of "There's nothing I can do to bring her back" and a determination to make my angel proud, have also helped! Mark

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I just wish more could understand where I am right now and not feel like people are giving up on me. This has been one of the most horrendous and difficult life experiences I am dealing with and it's not "getting easier" or "better" and I'm sure it won't. It's learning a new way to live that I wish I didn't have to live. Thanks so much and I'm so sorry for everyone who is feeling and experiencing grief. Wilma

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When my sister died we were in high school. I didn't want to donate her clothes or her stuff. I wore all her clothes and used all her stuff so whenever I went to school she was with me. But cried a lot once I got home. It was like a race going home because of all the emotions bottling up whenever I was in public. Earl

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As a bereaved parent I would add that it changes you. That other people are just going to have to roll with those changes. That you are less tolerant of BS, that you are more sensitive to unkindness, that you are more understanding of other people's grief, that you're not the person you were but in some ways much more and still worth loving. Becci

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If you head over to the BBC Stories Facebook page, you can read the experiences of many other people who know how grief feels. And if you like, you can also share your own story. Many thanks to all those who have done so already. We hope if we talk a bit more about grief, it might help, just a little.

Many thanks from the Like Minds Team

If you, or someone you know, have been affected by mental health issues, the following organisations may be able to help.

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