And that, dear reader, is all for today. Just joining? Where have you been? Let me start your catch-up by pointing you in the direction of three things to read on the BBC Sport website tonight:
1. Only one place to start. El Clasico. Suarez returned, but Real ruled. Read the report.
2. The latest episode in the Leeds United saga, the second manager of the season shown the door. Massimo Cellino has axed Darko Milanic after just 32 days at the club.
3. Which comedian kissed Sam Allardyce after West Ham's victory against Manchester City? Watch here.
With that, we're out of here. Don't forget to put your clock back.