TOTP: So, er, what was the last film that you saw?
Charley: I watched the Constant Gardener for the second time a few nights ago. I was with a friend who hadn't seen it, and I just thought it would be something they might be interested in. I think it was a good choice. It's a beautifully shot film, and we can all be considered hypocritical for watching it, and feeling sympathy, or anger, or whatever it inspires us to feel, bearing about how we go about our daily lives. But to have a fictional story raise that much awareness is just a great thing.

TOTP: Right. Now... I'm gonna take a wild punt here, and guess that I probably couldn't get away with taking you to see a film with Adam Sandler in it.
Charley: It has been known, actually. I think he's quite a good comedian, although I am not a fan of comedy at all. I like comedy in films, I don't like stand up comedy. I laugh very easily in real life, but when something is stilted and false, I find it very difficult to be absorbed. Why did you bring Adam Sandler up?

TOTP: Never mind. Hattie?
Hattie: I haven't seen a film for a very long time. But I recently watched the Finn Brothers live in concert. I was quite absorbed in that.

TOTP: What have you been reading lately?
Charley: I've got this Albert Goldman book on Lennon that I completely stole from a friend. But I haven't been able to finish it. I just want to do that so I can give it back. She knows I've got it. But that should be at the top of my reading list, just to keep her sweet.

TOTP: It sounds like you're not intending to give it back any time soon...
Charley: I'm keeping it.
TOTP: That's not really breaking it to her gently is it?
Charley: I know.
Hattie: Funnily enough, I've just been reading a book also about Lennon. It's called All We're Saying. It's absolutely amazing. I was very inspired.

TOTP: Aw! Read anything trashier recently?
Hattie: I've been known to read a few Mills & Boon books in my time. You know when you have a girly night and you whip out a book and read about Roger and his pulsating thigh.
Charley: Pulsating thigh?
TOTP: Yeah! You've gotta watch out for the pulsating thighs. It's a red light, isn't it?

Charley: I'm really drawn to health magazines. We've been reading a lot of trashy mags on the tourbus cos everyone brings their mags on there and there's a pile developing, along with the crumbs and the Marks & Spencer's wrappers.
TOTP: Hang on a minute? Marks & Spencer's? That's easily the least rock 'n' roll thing I've heard in ages.
Charley: Listen, M&S on the motorway is an absolute dream when all you've eaten is salt 'n' vinegar crisps to eat and Jack Daniel's to drink...
TOTP: Ach! You're just trying to rock 'n' roll it up now.
Charley: I got malnutrition last time we went on tour. Because that was all I ate and drank.
TOTP: Come on, you're the Webb sisters, not Motley Crue.

TOTP: What was the last slogan you saw on a t-shirt?
Charley: Something in a foreign language. I'll go out on a limb and say it was Japanese. It looked good, but for all I know it said: "Don't forget to eat your greens".
TOTP: Yeah, or your M&S essentials...
Hattie: Oi! I was in an airport a few months ago, and I saw this girl with a red t-shirt on. She was quite... well endowed, and the shirt said: "I wish these were brains"...

TOTP: Ooof! What was the last question you refused to answer?
Charley: It was this morning. Someone asked me if I would rather be a wombat or a platypus. And I couldn't really answer because... I'm not really all that familiar with either.
TOTP: What about if it was two animals that you were more sympathetic to?
Charley: That would be more appropriate. Go on then...
TOTP: Erm... well, what two animals are you more sympathetic to?
Charley: I love pugs. Do you like pugs?
TOTP: Absolutely not!
Charley: No one likes them. Everyone thinks they're ugly and I think they're lovely little twitching muscles.
Hattie: I don't want to know about that.
Charley: Although saying that, I do prefer bigger dogs. I loved labradors. We had a chocolate labrador when we were growing up.
TOTP: Aww! By the way, none of this is going in the interview...
Charley: Great. Well, anyway, I wouldn't want to be a pug because no one likes them. I don't know if I would get any cuddles. And they can't breathe properly. And they dribble, and I'm quite keen on personal hygiene. I don't think I want to be a pug anymore. Maybe a cat. You're in control a bit if you're a cat.

TOTP: Well, I think we've covered this in some depth...
Charley: But I haven't really reached a conclusion.
TOTP: Well... put it on some kind of blog on the internet. Hattie? What question did you last refuse to answer?
Hattie: This one.

TOTP: Oh I see! Person you last refused to speak to?
Hattie: Charley! She's been known to put the phone down on me a few times.
Charley: Actually, you're more likely to hang up on me. Wouldn't you say?
Hattie: That's cos I'm in a rush.
Charley: Oh yeah. That's what they all say.

TOTP: Er... I don't want to stir this up, but this actually sounds quite interesting.
Charley: Have you ever hung up on someone and pretended to be cut off?
TOTP: Yeah...
Hattie: Are you gonna do it in a minute?
TOTP: ...
Hattie: He's gone hasn't he?

TOTP: Smirk! Hello! Who was the last person you kissed?
Charley: There's a woman called Helen here. We kissed her. On both cheeks, and I think there was a bit of a hug.
TOTP: You're in London then?
Charley: Yes. Why do you ask?
TOTP: Well, cos, outside of London, the kissing is a bit more flexible...
Charley: On the lips?
TOTP: On the cheeks...
Charley: Oh, the shake and the pull...
TOTP: Pardon?
Charley: Er. Argh! That came out really wrong!

TOTP: It did a bit. OK, last person you fancied?
Charley: Terrible that I have to think this long. I think it was Fedora. I saw him last week. And there was something about his determination.
Hattie: Tennis players have got very nice legs I think...
TOTP: They've got pulsating thighs...
Charley: Yes! That's what Hattie likes.
Hattie: Give me a pulsating thigh and I'm happy.
TOTP: So who did you last fancy, Hattie?
Hattie: I don't know. I can't think...
Charley: I know who it was. It was Ryan Gosling from the Notebook. Now when you first see him, you think, well, he's alright. But when you see him in the film, I totally know what she means. He's slightly dark, broody, but looks like a very loving, passionate bloke.
Hattie: What do you think of him?
TOTP: He wears a beard quite well.
Hattie: I love beards! All beards are better in some ways. I'm not sure about placid ones...
TOTP: Placid beards? How does that work?
Charley: Some people have got them. I think it's when they can't quite keep in line with the washing... so they have to get it out of the way. You know, the ones that are very long and braided with a bead in them.