Diet Hards |
A cautionary tale for would-be dieters out there, in five easy to swallow pieces...
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 Geri Halliwell
 Geri has become more famous for her weight than she has for her music, and trust us, we've heard 'Passion' and it's no loss. But anyway, we digest (that's digress - sensitive Ed). After slimming down to the size of a malnourished atom, Geri then went on and on about her weight until the whole world wanted to lock her away in a burger van. Then, she went all curvy again. What was that all about? Geri explained: "When I was skinny, it was like a desert (what, your dinner plate?). And the minute I got a few pounds on me, it changed. I'm quite shocked, actually, with the attention I receive. When I hit 30 I stopped trying to control things. It was either full throttle or nothing. Now I realise life is a bit of both." Too right, Gezza! And don't forget the mayo!
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 Robbie Williams
 Course, one of the fun things about celebs on diets is that they get so hungry, they end up taking huge bites out of each other. Not in a perv way, obviously, but take Robbie here. He's had his fair share of keeping the wobbly Williams at bay, and when he saw Geri Halliwell's attempts to make the rest of the world look like one big Sumo convention, it was the perfect opportunity to do some mickey taking. He said: "I have done the [Atkins] diet. I don't eat bread and potatoes, but I'm not Geri-esque about it. Mind you, neither's she. I think she ate Doctor Atkins!" That Robbie, eh? Still, he's not in any danger
of biting off more than he can chew.
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 Mariah Carey
 Listen up, kids, if you want an example of why diets are bad, look no further than Mazza. Take the Live 8 performance, and the slimming stories that preceeded it. In the lead up to the '8, everyone and their news nanny made a big deal over Mariah's preparation of the event. She said: "This is such a special event for me. I want to sing my best and look my best. I've been working on my voice to make sure it's in top condition and working on my body too. I've been dieting and exercising non-stop so I can get into the outfit I want to wear." And what happened? She was so weak she needed a chair to sit on (while surrounded by standing African kids) and needed a glass of water to get through the set. Cuh! Stop playing with the melons, Mariah and get some bananas down ya!
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 Brian McFadden
 Now here's a man who's taking the whole life-shedding thing a bit too far. You think that having been a member of Westlife, had his every move accompanied by the sound of screaming girls, and being married to Kerry Katona would be enough to contend with. But our Bry also had to put up with Simon Cowell - a man who can't can't usually see over his belt loops - telling him he was a bit porky. So what did Brian do? He lost the weight. Well done! Then his boyband image! Good move! Then the 'Y' from his name. Er, OK. And eventually... his wife. Whoa, dude! Cowelly might have said 'get a life', but he didn't say 'shed a wife'!
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 Girls Aloud
 You'd think that being in Girls Aloud would be enough of an ordeal, what with the touring, photoshoots, endless footballer dodging, the nightclubs, the queue for the toilets (yeah we get it - impatient Ed)... But having to put up with Louis Walsh, the guy who makes Brian McFadden look like Brad Pitt, telling you you're too porky. What could be worse? How about working your arse, thighs and other minutely wobbly bits right off your body, only to be told you're too thin! "None of them has eating disorders but they are all looking pretty thin at the moment," said one insider, who luckily, has the solution: "They will be given recipes and cooking lessons because none of them can really cook that well." Nice! You'll be telling us they smell of wee next!
Tae M
28/07/2005
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Should popstars worry about their weight?
Lisa
they're presenting a bad example to kids and teenagers by being too thin
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It's Party Time!  |
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We're having a party to celebrate the end of TOTP Online and the start of the Chart Blog...look who's here! |
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Big Bother |
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The normal show's over for another year, but there's still time to get our requests in for the next Celeb Big Brother... |
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When Song Titles Go Silly |
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Abandon sense, all ye who enter here to see the strangest song titles in pop history... |
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Dream TOTP Presenters |
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If only we'd had these people on our side, history would have been VERY different *sniff*... |
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Web-Singers |
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Five acts whose very career can be blamed on modern technology. |
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Doing It For The Kids |
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What if pop stars were left in charge of kids' TV for a day? Won't somebody think of the children? |
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Who Sean Did Next... |
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We all know Sean Paul likes to collaborate, but this is getting ridulous... |
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Take Cover! |
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Some popstars aren't so much people as forces of nature. Watch out for this lot... |
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The 5 Stages Of ROCK |
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OR: Why the humble whistle is the ultimate factor in deciding what ROCKS and what does NOT ROCK. |
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They Are The Resurrection |
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This lot didn't just cheat career death, they laughed in its face... |
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Britain's Next Pop Model |
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Mariah's planning to take the fashion world by storm, but she'll have to watch out for this lot... |
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Drama Queens |
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Forget reality TV - how would popstars fare in a TV drama? |
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Pop Conspiracies |
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Weird stuff happens in pop from time to time, it's enough to make some of us paranoid... |
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I'll Show YOU! |
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Popstars who should have left their egos behind, not their careers... |
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Crapper Rappers |
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Next time this lot pic up the mic, it had better be just to sing... |
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Reality Pop Stars |
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They've braved the glare of wall-to-wall cameras and survived. Well, mostly... |
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Indie-lympics |
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They're skinny, they're whiny, and they're doing it for Blighty! |
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Daft Predictions: 2006 |
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What will 2006 bring for this bunch of celebs? Are you sure you wanna know? |
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Secret Santa |
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If we were to give these popstars the perfect Chrimbo gift, we reckon these Xmas crackers would do the trick... |
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Xmas Turkeys |
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The kind of festive chart-toppers that would make Cliff Richard turn Scrooge. |
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Toy Story |
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Abandon your pressies! We bring you the pop toys you really wanted this Christmas, you lucky things! |
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Rock School |
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Girls Aloud are taking Biology, but who's got Double Maths, and who's hanging out behind the bike sheds? |
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Name Academy |
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Five acts whose names could've done with a re-think BEFORE the CDs got pressed up. |
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Food Fighters |
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As Snoop launches his own brand of Hot Dogg, we wonder who else will put their money where their mouth is. |
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Arty Popstars |
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They call themselves 'artists', but which pop stars would know one end of a gallery from the other? |
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Oi You! Outside Now! |
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If these chart rivals ever had to face-off in the pop ring, who would win? |
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Grow A Spine! |
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Some stars are wetter than others. Meet a few who you could wring out like a sponge... |
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Eaten By The Pop Beast |
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What's with all these bands losing members lately? Is it the work of some member-munching pop monster? |
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These Words...Are Bonkers |
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Never let a pop star sit down with a pen, they don't know what they're doing... |
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Too Long Titles |
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When it comes to picking short sharp song titles, this lot thought more was more... |
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Oi! Cheer up! |
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It's a case of one grump or two for these pop moodychops! |
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Charlie And The Mock-late Factory |
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The pop stars who narrowly failed to get a part in Willy Wonka (and not in a bad way...). |
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Parent Repellants |
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Playing your music loud is one thing, but bring home one of these bad boys and you'll be grounded into space dust. |
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Non-Stop Popsters |
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Rolling Stones are 40 years and still going. So, which of these pop gippers will be around in 2045? |
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Diet Hards |
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A cautionary tale for would-be dieters out there, in five easy to swallow pieces... |
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Bond Rocking Beats |
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Kanye and Robbie have sampled 007, but who else could remix a Bond theme? |
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Endorse-Mentalists |
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Is there ANYTHING that popstars won't sell on the side? Apparently not! |
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Y Kant U Spel Proply? |
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We asked a linguistics expert to mark pop songs for spelling mistakes. Just for fun! |
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Five acts we wanna see at Live 8 |
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No doubt about it, there's little to top that Live 8 lineup. Except... |
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Crooner Eclipse |
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We don't mind rappers acting the big 'I am', just as long as they don't sing... |
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Tell It To The Judge |
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They fought the law, and the law won (except when it lost). |
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Welcome Back! |
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The pop acts who YOU'D like to see strutting their stuff one more time... |
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Britney's Auction Items |
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Forget collecting the albums, these days fans want something a bit more personal from their fave stars... |
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The People That Elton Wronged |
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You don't have to be an incompetent journalist to earn a tongue-lashing from Lord Pop Almighty... |
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Lord Of The Blings |
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This lot weren't in the Lord Of The Rings films, but they should've been. Here's why... |
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You Still Here? |
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The bands who went past their sell-by date, and then reversed... |
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Ice Queens |
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These frosty popstrels could give scary lessons to the Blair Witch... |
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Have-A-Go Heroes |
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Trouble called, they answered. These pop stars are all Super Men (and woman). |
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Cover Calamities |
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If you love the song so much, why do you treat it so badly, popsters? |
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Skinny Indie Kids |
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Your mum thinks this lot could do with a good square meal, and she's not wrong... |
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