
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona - as it happened
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- Real close gap at top to one point
- First three league goals Barca have conceded
- Ronaldo has scored in 11 games in a row
- Suarez assisted Neymar opener
Live Reporting
Mike Henson
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Latest PostPost update
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Next up for Real Madrid are third-tier Cornella in the Copa del Rey, before Granada away in La Liga and Liverpool at home in the Champions League on 4 November.
Next for Barcelona is Celta Vigo at home on 1 November before they face Ajax away four days later.
Next for me is plateful of canteen chilli, followed by a cracking afternoon of Sunday football. See you there.
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Luis Suarez has been doing a lot of talking recently.
Extracts from his new book appeared in the Guardian this morning and there are some pearls in there.
"When I was a kid, I got sent off for headbutting a referee: I ran 50m to argue a decision, I was shown a red card and I headbutted him. I'm really not proud of that" is my favourite.
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Times journalist Tony Barrett: Luis Suarez talking to the Spanish media
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
There blows the vote klaxon.
Our readers' vote is now shut and Cristiano Ronaldo takes home the man-of-the-match spoils with a very healthy 32.3% of the vote.
Isco (20%) and Dani Carvajal (12.7%) were closest to the nicking the award.
Neymar, the only Barcelona player on the list, attracted only 4.2% of your clicks.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
After that win might Gareth Bale, who missed today through a thigh injury, find himself riding the pine on the Real Madrid bench?
Manager Carlo Ancelotti says not: "Bale is a fundamental player for this team. He will play whenever he is fit.
"Isco was amazing but in order to beat Barcelona every one had to play as well as they did.
"I'm satisfied with our work. I'm proud of everyone."
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
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It was a classic six-pointer tonight. A Barcelona win and Luis Enrique's side would have been seven points clear of Real Madrid and possibly over the horizon.
As it is, their lead is down to one point. The return at the Nou Camp in on 22 March. Mark the diary.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Luis Suarez did not have a single shot in his 69 minutes on the pitch. But don't take that stat too seriously.
He was straight up to speed, linking well with Neymar and Lionel Messi, getting an assist for Barcelona's goal and setting up another couple of chances.
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Perhaps Luka Modric might get your vote as man of the match. The Croatia midfielder kept Real's Rolls Royce of a team purring and put himself about in defence as well.
Vote
Who was the brightest star in Real Madrid galaxy?
You can vote for your man of the match on the right hand side of this very page. The poll closes at 19:30 BST and you can get across the small print over here.
European football writer Andy West will be dishing out some player ratings on this site shortly as well.
There will be no bottle of bubbly for the player who comes top of either, but the pride they will take in it?
Off the scale.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Piers Morgan tweets: I think this settles the Ronaldo v Messi 'Big Dog' debate. Rottweiler v Chihuahua tonight.
Yep, that is definitely conclusive. That one match after hundreds of goals scored between them and with plenty more meetings to come. Debate over. Finito.
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Gary Lineker
BBC Sport
"I love that Ronaldo is so desperate to receive every ball, to score every goal, to never be satisfied."
Join the debate at #bbceurofooty
Matt Congreve: Real Madrid always turn up for the big games, a great team who are great to watch.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
They are the sleekest, most efficient victory-collecting machine around just now.
Real Madrid had less of the ball, were pretty much matches in terms of efforts on goal, but found a pretty stylish way to a comfortable win.
FULL-TIME
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Done and dusted and the home celebrations are pretty low-key with the destination of the three points clear from a good quarter of an hour from time.
YELLOW CARD
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
A bit of handbags between Cristiano Ronaldo and Dani Alves sees the Real Madrid man booked. Fair enough, his naughty little backheel kick at Alves kicked it all off.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Neymar wins a cheap free-kick giving Lionel Messi a free-kick to look at central and 35 yards out.
The Argentine cuffs his effort well over the wall and into a stand of jeering Madridistas.
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Daniel Hudson: Real Madrid got an absolute bargain with Toni Kroos for £20 million. Worth twice that surely, great player.
INJURY TIME
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
It could be more comfortable for Real Madrid. Another counter attack almost unlocks the tiring Barcelona defence as we tick into three minutes of injury time.
SUBSTITUTION
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
A couple of time-munching late substitutions from Real Madrid as Karim Benzema and Luka Modric make way for Sami Khedira and Alvaro Arbeloa.
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Jamie Smith: Real have to be considered the best team in the world at the moment, they've amassed an amazing team! Wow!
Five to go
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Barcelona are keeping the ball, but Real Madrid are keeping concentration.
The visitors are popping the ball around on the fringes of the penalty box, but the white wall shifts seamlessly to block up any avenue they choose to try.
SUBSTITUTION
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
That is the sound of the shutters slamming down.
Isco off and Asier Illarramendi on to shore up the Real Madrid midfield.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Real Madrid stream forward, leaving vapour trails across the Bernabeu turf.
Barcelona are stretched all out of shape by the pace of the counter-attack, but Cristiano Ronaldo's final pass to James Rodriguez is just off target.
Ten minutes to go
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Barcelona need something from somewhere very soon. Real Madrid are holding their opponents at bay with some ease and looking dangerous on the break themselves.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Lionel Messi turns left and right, eventually shaking off the attentions of Marcelo by the byeline. His chipped cross is right down Real keeper Iker Casillas's throat though.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
The Oles have started, coinciding with each successful Real Madrid pass. You can see where the Bernabeu is coming from. Barcelona look out of puff and short of possession.
Fifteen minutes to go.
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Shohidur Rahman: Isco was man of the match for me against Liverpool and he's been sensational again today.
YELLOW CARD
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Dani Carvajal chops down Jeremy Mathieu and becomes the first Real Madrid man to have his name taken.
SUBSTITUTION
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
More problems for Barcelona. Andres Iniesta pulls up in midfield with a pulled calf and cannot continue.
Sergi Roberto is on in his place. Munir El Haddadi would have been a more adventurous choice and that is all three subs used for the visitors.
SUBSTITUTION
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Luis Suarez is not going to be left to chase the game. His race is run with a little under 70 minutes on the clock.
He scored on debut for Gronigen, Ajax and Liverpool, but not today.
Pedro replaces the Uruguayan.
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Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
What have Barcelona got in response then? Ivan Rakitic tries his luck from 20 yards and a tight angle, but his effort is a weak trundler.
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Jono: It's all sideways then run at defender, stand off him, tackle, then pass sideways again. What's wrong with big tackles these days?
Is Ron 'Chopper' Harris what El Clasico misses Jono? Here is a picture of a whack just for you. And I'll ignore the cheap double entendre.
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Aston Villa midfielder Jack Grealish: If James Rodriguez comes out of this team for Bale then I actually think it's up there with one of the best teams of all time!
Queens Park Rangers midfielder Joey Barton tweets: Can the Neymar fan club remind me if he is still playing. #ridculouslyoverrated
SUBSTITUTION
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona
Just before that goal, Xavi came off for Ivan Rakitic for Barcelona. Rakitic's first touch was a duffed corner that left Barcelona exposed in defence in the run-up to the third.
GOAL
Real Madrid 3-1 Barcelona - Karim Benzema (61 mins)
Barcelona's desire to play from everywhere catches up with them.
Andres Iniesta attempts to flick a pass inside to a team-mate when he could let it roll out for a throw, but he has got his wires crossed and only finds Isco.
Real Madrid ruthlessly exploit the open space. Isco finds Ronaldo, who finds James Rodriguez who finds Karim Benzema who finds the net. It was like a child's dot-to-dot for them.
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Real Madrid 2-1 Barcelona
Pedro is warming up on the sideline and Luis Suarez is burning through the last gas in his tanks.
The former Liverpool striker turns Sergio Ramos, but spotting that a covering defender is gong to get to the ball first , flops to the turf from the slightest touch.
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Real Madrid 2-1 Barcelona
Neymar gets in down the left-hand channel, spinning the Real defence, who only just recover in time to prevent his delicately weighted pull-back running into Lionel Messi's path.
Jeremy Mathieu rattles is a decent rising effort that demands an equally good save from Iker Casillas as Barca press for a leveller.
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Real Madrid 2-1 Barcelona
Luis Suarez is crawling all over the back of Sergio Ramos, looking for a way round the Real Madrid defender, but Ramos stands strong.
Typically busy, determined, streetwise hustling from Suarez though on his debut.
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Real Madrid 2-1 Barcelona
And Barcelona's defence is almost torn to ribbons again. Luka Modric's clever reverse ball is just out of reach of Karim Benzema as he bursts beyond the last man.
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Spanish football writer Graham Hunter tweets: Team which deserves to be in the lead is in the lead. No question.
GOAL
Real Madrid 2-1 Barcelona - Pepe (50 mins)
You don't save those. A classic bulleted header from Pepe who is left free at the back stick to empathically convert Toni Kroos's deep corner.
The Portuguese defender thrusts two open palms towards the Real fans in celebration. Ten fingers, one for each European Cup.
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Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
Both sides have been straining at the leash straight from the restart.
Sergio Ramos bombs upfield at the slightest sniff of a counter-attack and Dani Alves is pushed on all the way to the corner flag for the visitors.
There are more goals in this one. Plenty more.
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Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
The referee is not endearing himself to the Barcelona players. Luka Modric looks sheepish after a cynical foul to prevent Luis Suarez getting away from him, but there is no yellow card forthcoming.
Four Barca man booked and none of the home side so far remember.
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Broadcaster Piers Morgan on Twitter: Not one Arsenal player would get in either of these teams, with possible exception of Alexis. I predicted 3-1 to Madrid and I stand by that prediction.
Would Alexis get back in Piers? Messi, Suarez and Neymar - can't see it.
Send us all your views on #bbceurofooty.
KICK-OFF
Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
Caught your breath? Good. We are back up and running.
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There was an amusing moment when Cristiano Ronaldo thumped home his equalising penalty and the cameras panned to the VIP section for reaction from his other half.
Irina Shayk looked distinctly bored, before spotting herself on the big screen and quickly re-setting her features to suitably delighted.
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Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
By the way David [at 17:01], there is some Premier League action afoot right now.
The general consensus among those watching Swansea v Leicester here at BBC Sport towers is that it is a step down from the fare on offer at the Bernabeu.
Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
Join the debate at #bbceurofooty
David Broome: Great quality on both teams but I can't get excited about a thousand square passes. I'll stick with the Premier League.
C'mon David, there was a fair bit going on in between those passes...Or am I getting high on hype?
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Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
The numbers behind a corking half of football. Barcelona looked like they wanted to take the sting out of the game after going ahead. But Real Madrid upped the pace to get Gerard Pique and Jeremy Mathieu all flustered at the heart of the visiting defence.
HALF-TIME
Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
WHAT A MISS!
Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
A free header from 10 yards but James Rodriguez gets it all horribly wrong, allowing the ball to smear across his forehead and wide.
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Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
Luis Enrique doesn't want his Barcelona side slacking. He waves them forward from the sidelines, demanding they press Real Madrid right until the half-time whistle.
Five minutes to the break
Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
Forty minutes that felt like five. We have five minutes to the break and both sets of players, and the ref, will have earned their oranges.
Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
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Goonerama: How much does Ronaldo cost in Spanish fantasy football?
I don't think you'd get too far if you didn't pick him would you?
YELLOW CARD
Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
The referee shows no mercy as Andres Iniesta pleads that his trip on Luka Modric was his first offence. Into the book goes the Spain lynchpin. He is the fourth Barcelona name in there.
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Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona
The Bernabeu is bubbling. It had looked as if Barcelona were getting into a passing groove after taking the lead, but suddenly Real are looking quicker all around the pitch.
Barca seem to have deployed Jeremy Mathieu man-to-man against Cristiano Ronaldo to try to turn the tide.
GOAL
Real Madrid 1-1 Barcelona - Cristiano Ronaldo (35 mins pen)
Cristiano Ronaldo sends Claudio Bravo the wrong way with a solid side-foot into the left-hand bottom corner.
Barcelona's defence is breached for the first time in 815 minutes of La Liga football and Ronaldo's run of scoring in every home league game since September 2013 continues.
PENALTY TO REAL MADRID
Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
It had been brewing. After several close calls, the referee points to the spot as Gerard Pique blocks Marcelo's low cross with his arm.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Trying to keep your eyes across this one is like single-handedly supervising a school trip to France. There is trouble brewing all over the place.
Dani Alves thumps a shot just wide at one end, as Gerard Pique gets away with a sly tug on Karim Benzema's shirt in the Barca box.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Luis Suarez looks like he slotted in perfectly alongside Lionel Messi and Neymar. The three of them are all clever movement and canny passes and it takes a stretching challenge from Dani Carvajal to snuff out some growing danger.
PENALTY APPEAL
Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Cristiano Ronaldo is shooting daggers at the referee. The Portuguese superstar turns inside Sergio Busquets, tumbling as he brushes chests with the Barcelona man. Ronaldo wants a penalty. The referee wants him to calm down and get on with it.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
There is plenty of venom in the early challenges. Toni Kroos rakes his studs down the shin of Lionel Messi, but escapes a yellow.
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Former Liverpool defender Jamie Carragher tweets: Luis Suarez like David Beckham here.
Suarez has delivered some fantastic early crosses.
CLOSE!
Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
What a chance! What a miss! And what a man to commit the error!
Real Madrid try to press the play and get caught out of kilter. Luis Suarez peels down the left flank and threads a low cross in behind the turned Real defence. Lionel Messi meets it four yards out, but screws his side foot wide, perhaps put off by the Iker Casillas's sprawl.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Barcelona are starting to put their foot on the ball, taking some of the pace out of a relentless first 20 minutes. A prolonged spell of Barca possession draws whistles from the Bernabeu stands.
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Bright Eugene VII: Messi and Neymar are both sitting on one booking. This will definitely be interesting.
Hugh in France: Millions of footballers in S America. But the best 4 are on the pitch together in Madrid. Impressive. Especially James.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Midfield doesn't seem to exist at the moment. It is just two attacks going hammer and tongs at two defences at either end of the pitch.
Cristiano Ronaldo cocks his left foot from an acute angle, but his effort is a scruffy one, easily gathered by Claudio Bravo.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Toni Kroos gets his head up from 25 yards and thuds a shot into the midriff of Claudio Bravo. That is Real Madrid's fifth shot on goal already.
YELLOW CARD
Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Neymar in the book as well now after clattering into Dani Carvajal as revenge for an earlier challenge. Lionel Messi and Neymar are the game's first two cautions, hardly your classic hatchet men.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
It was 4-3 in this fixture last season. It was an absolute belter and this is living up to that high standard. Both attacks looking as sharp as razors.
HITS THE WOODWORK
Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Cristiano Ronaldo whips in a left-wing cross and Real Madrid team-mate Karim Benzema meets it with a thumping header which crashes against the bar. Benzema is quickest to the rebound and smashes it goalwards but it appears to graze the woodwork again on its way behind.
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Andrew Priestley: Neymar has really stepped up his game over the past 6 months. He's finally showing his world-class potential. What a start!
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Beautiful skill from Marcelo to escape down the left but his low cross is just behind Karim Benzema. Real upping the pressure and Barca defending frantically.
YELLOW CARD
Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Lionel Messi commits another foul - this time on Toni Kroos - and is rightly shown the yellow card he should have received a minute earlier.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Karim Benzema ghosts into the Barcelona area and meets a long ball, getting there ahead of Claudio Bravo but the Barcelona keeper gets his left hand on his shot to palm it to safety.
Lionel Messi is lucky not to get a yellow card after scything down Luka Modric on the halfway line.
Worth a bet that most players would have been booked there, but butter wouldn't melt for the Argentine.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
Immediate response? Cristiano Ronaldo cuts inside from the left and is fouled 25 yards out, towards the corner of the box. Free-kick, we all know who's taking it, but the Portuguese star whacks it into the wall.
One hundred and eighty beats per minute football.
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Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona
The English eyes will automatically focus on Luis Suarez's part in that goal, but Barcelona's opener was all about Neymar, jagging in off the left flank and arrowing a superb finish past Iker Casillas.
GOAL
Real Madrid 0-1 Barcelona - Neymar (4 mins)
Luis Suarez plays a crossfield pass to Neymar who controls with his chest, cuts inside and curls a beauty of a low shot into the corner, no chance for Iker Casillas. What a start!
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Real Madrid 0-0 Barcelona
Terrific noise around the Bernabeu as Barcelona immediately get the ball rolling and immediately launch a sustained spell of possession. Luis Suarez gets a touch after 18 seconds and Real don't touch the ball until more than a minute has elapsed. No danger though.
KICK-OFF
Real Madrid 0-0 Barcelona
Real assert their status by unveiling a huge banner depicting each of their 10 European trophies - six more than Barca - behind one of the goals as the players emerge.
We are under way.
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Andy West
European football writer
"A friendly moment in the tunnel between Dani Alves and Marcelo - international team-mates but club foes today - as the players wait to come out.
"Iker Casillas is doing his best to look relaxed, leaning back with his arms folded and a smile on a face, but he's under huge pressure after his recent gaffes."
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Just 500 Barcelona fans are allowed to take in El Clasico in person. Luis Suarez takes care to pay tribute to the travelling contingent as he heads back to the dressing room. Just four minutes to the off.
X-factor
Join the debate at #bbceurofooty
Everton midfielder Ross Barkley tweets: Who'll win the El Clasico? I'm saying Barca.
Tuning in in Uruguay
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
The last Uruguayan to play in El Clasico was?
Pablo Garcia in 2006. Luis Suarez joins an elite club of his countrymen.
Garcia only played 22 league games in three years at the Bernabeu. Something tells me Suarez will have a bigger impact in Spain.
A lover, not a biter
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
The journey that has taken Luis Suarez from sweeping Uruguayan streets to El Clasico is one worthy of the Andrew Lloyd Webber treatment.
He met Sofia Balbi as a 15-year-old. She was from the right side of town, he wasn't. When her family moved to Spain in 2003, they were forced apart and he was left with football as his only hope of following her.
This summer, nine years, a marriage and two children later, he finally completed his mission.
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Join the debate at #bbceurofooty
Paul Johnson has sent us the best Barcelona and Real Madrid composite team of his lifetime. This team couldn't do it on a cold night in Stoke.
All-time XI: Casillas; Puyol, Hierro, R.Carlos, Xavi, Zidane, Messi, Rivaldo, Ronaldo, C.Ronaldo, Raul.
Text us on 81111
We've been asking you to name a best starting XI made up of current players from Barca and Real.
Tomas:Ter Stegen, Alba, Alves, Varane, Pique, Xavi, Iniesta, Isco, Ronaldo, Messi, Neymar.
Chris Clarke, Belfast: Casillas, Alves, Ramos, Pique, Alba, Busquets, Modric, Iniesta, Ronaldo, Messi, Suarez.
Training ground japes
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Travelling away to your biggest rivals in front of a global television audience of about half a billion people. It should be enough to get the butterflies fluttering.
But Barcelona have been gambolling around like spring lambs in training.
Luis Suarez got up to mischief with a prank on Gerard Pique...
...before Lionel Messi wreaked revenge. I think I would rather take the flick-on-the-ear punishment.
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"Nine years ago we witnessed an equally star-studded Clasico collision, when Madrid's 4-2 win at the Bernabeu saw David Beckham, Raul, World Cup winners Zinedine Zidane, Ronaldo and Roberto Carlos plus Michael Owen pull apart a Barca side decorated by Ronaldinho, Samuel Eto'o, Xavi and Andres Iniesta.
"So why the feeling this week that Saturday night in Madrid might outstrip them all, even with the caveats that history brings?"
BBC chief sports writer Tom Fordyce has taken the long view on the historic fixture. And failed to mention Thomas Gravesen in his list of Galacticos.
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
As Luis Enrique and Carlo Ancelotti prepare their pre-match pep-talks, consider the unwanted one delivered to Barca at the Bernabeu in 1943.
Leading 3-0 after the first leg of the Generalissimo Cup, Barcelona were visited in the dressing room by an unidentified official.
"Do not forget that some of you are only playing because of the generosity of the regime that has forgiven you for your lack of patriotism," he told them, referring to the country's recent civil war and Catalonia's opposition to General Franco, a Real Madrid fan.
Madrid won 11-1 to advance to the final.
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
AS meanwhile just let the quality wash over us, with pen pics of the star-studded line-ups.
It doesn't need much more than that to get the juices flowing...
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
This morning's Spanish sports paper Marca have got Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi rampaging around the Madrid skyline like football's version of Godzilla versus King Kong.
"The two titans of football go head to head in the biggest game in football," reads the headline. Roughly anyway...
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
I think the Barcelona bus might be best to take take the back road to the Bernabeu. Here is the welcome afforded to the home team.
Half a billion reasons to watch
Our BBC accountants have got their calculators out and Real Madrid's line-up today costs £303m - to Barcelona's £223m.
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BBC Radio 5 live
Spanish football writer Graham Hunter on BBC Radio 5 live on Friday: "I think Luis Suarez fits in Barcelona's team brilliantly. He presses like Samuel Eto'o used to do at his best and it is something that Luis Enrique has asked the whole team to do.
"Secondly when you score as many goals as he does, you walk into any side. His threat will drag defenders away from Lionel Messi."
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No room for Neymar in three of those four line-ups below.
Those are the kind of big calls you have to make when you are putting together a composite XI.
Join the debate at #bbceurofooty
Frederick: Navas - Carvajal - Varane - Ramos - Marcelo; Modric - Busquets - Iniesta; Bale - Messi - Ronaldo
Chris Dickson: Casillas - Alves - Pique - Ramos - Alba; Iniesta - Bale - Kroos; Messi - Cristiano - Suarez
Tell us your composite El Clasico XI.
Text us on 81111
We've been asking you to name a best starting XI made up of current players from Barca and Real.
Ryan: Navas, Marcelo, Ramos, Pique, Carvajal, Kroos, Iniesta, James, Neymar, Ronaldo, Messi.
Jamie, Cheshunt: Ter Stergen, Carvajal, Alba, Ramos, Varane, Modric, Kroos, Iniesta, Suarez, Messi, Ronaldo.
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It isn't only the fancy-dan forwards who are re-writing the record books either.
Barcelona's defence has yet to be breached in eight league games, a record for successive clean sheets at the start of a Spanish season for goalkeeper Claudio Bravo.
They came quite seriously unstuck against Paris St-Germain's quality in the Champions League last month though, losing 3-2.
Perhaps they are not quite watertight just yet...
Devastation's what you need
Norris McWhirter would be furious.
Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo have been forcing continual revisions to the record books.
And there are more landmarks on the line today.
Messi's left-footed strike in Saturday's 3-0 victory over Eibar took him to the milestone of 250 career goals in La Liga, leaving the Barcelona man just one behind the record held by 1940s Athletic Bilbao star Telmo Zarra.
Ronaldo has scored 15 times in seven La Liga games this season. His streak has included three hat-tricks. Another this evening would be his 23rd in La Liga, one more than Zarra and Alfredo Di Stefano who he currently shares the record with.
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
BBC Radio 5 live
Spanish football writer Graham Hunter on BBC Radio 5 live on Friday: "This has become the world's biggest game and a lot of that is just down to the sheer quality of the players. It has always had brilliant players, guys like Raul, Hristo Stoichkov, Maradona and Michael Laudrup, but it has never been quite like this."
LINE-UPS
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Real Madrid: Casillas; Carvajal, Pepe, Ramos, Marcelo; Kroos, Modric, Isco; Rodriguez, Ronaldo; Benzema.
Barcelona: Bravo; Mathieu, Pique, Mascherano, Alves; Busquets, Xavi, Iniesta; Neymar, Messi, Suarez.
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
There it is then....
Barcelona have gone both barrels in the Bernabeu with a three-pronged attack consisting of Lionel Messi, Luis Suarez and Neymar.
Eye-wateringly awesome.
BreakingBreaking team news
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Luis Suarez starts for Barcelona in his first competitive game since a four-month ban for biting. He takes Pedro's place in the starting line-up.
BreakingBreaking team news
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Real Madrid make two changes from the side that beat Liverpool at Anfield with Sergio Ramos and Dani Carvajal returning to the team in place of Raphael Varane and Alvaro Arbeloa.
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
There a couple of Catalan whispers on social media that Luis Suarez has been thrown straight into the Barcelona starting XI.
A big, bold move if true. We'll let you know when the truth lands...
"Suarez has it all"
Former Manchester United goalkeeper Peter Schmeichel
Football Focus
"There is no striker playing anywhere now who is as good as Luis Suarez was last year for Liverpool. He scored from everywhere. And the way he plays, you do not know where he is going. He does not have one single style as such. He has everything."
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Luis Suarez in focus
There's plenty of anticipation over Barcelona striker Luis Suarez's involvement in El Clasico. The Uruguayan is available again after his four-month ban for biting Italian defender Giorgio Chiellini at the 2014 World Cup and, during his time at Liverpool, he got better with each season.
Join the debate at #bbcfootball and 81111
Here's a little selection poser for you.
Boil two of the greatest sets of players ever assembled down to the best composite starting XI.
No naming a midfield consisting entirely of strikers either. We want balanced brilliance.
Get it right and you'll be close to an Earth XI to play Mars for the future of the planet.
Your best attempts are welcome on #bbceurofooty or 81111 on text.
Travelling party
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
We are 15 minutes away from the announcement of Carlo Ancelotti and Luis Enrique's starting XIs, but Barcelona have released their 18-man match-day squad.
Luis Suarez, as promised by Enrique, is in. As is Sergio Busquets who missed the Champions League match against Ajax.
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Real Madrid: Arriving at the Bernabeu.
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Mark Lawrenson
Football analyst
"It is a mouth-watering game. Ronaldo and Messi are, if anything, better than last season.
"It is so hard to call but I would go for Real to edge it this time.
"From what I've seen of them, the only thing that will stop them becoming the first team to win back-to-back Champions Leagues this season is their defensive problems because they can still have a bad day, but you can get to Barca at the back too.
"If you are a football fan, you just sit and watch this game and enjoy it. As a neutral it is great because I am not too bothered who wins but I just know it will be full of absolutely everything - quality, intensity and lots of incident. It is becoming an unmissable event."
Four freebies??
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
And just for balance here is the predicted Barcelona XI.
For more on the brain-boggling numbers behind the biggest game in club football, take a gander at our Clasico in numbers article.
Big names, big numbers
Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
So how much do you need to put together a set of Galacticos to entertain you in your back garden?
Considerably more than a Euromillions lottery jackpot it turns out.
Here is Real Madrid's predicted line-up reduced to the cold, hard cash paid by the Spanish giants for each player.
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Only in this match could the debut of a record-breaking controversy-magnet goal-machine possibly be relegated to a sideshow.
Between them these Real Madrid and Barcelona squads contain the five most expensive players in history.
Top-of the shop Gareth Bale (£85m) is out of contention with a thigh injury, but Cristiano Ronaldo (£80m), Suarez (£75m), Neymar (£75m) and James Rodriguez (£63m) will all be involved.
And then there is freebie Lionel Messi playing for the visitors....
Unforgettable Suarez has to raise his game
Former Arsenal defender Martin Keown
Football Focus
"Luis Suarez has to raise it even more at Barcelona now. He can score goals from anywhere, you cannot take your eyes off him. We can't wait to watch the game. Suarez left something with us here in the UK. It is a shame he has gone but I'm sure he will do well for Barca."
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Real Madrid v Barcelona (17:00 BST)
Thirteen months, 31 Premier League goals, 75 million pounds and another ill-advised mid-match snack later and Luis Suarez is back at the centre of the footballing universe.
Real Madrid v Barcelona is a little under 90 minutes away. And the Uruguayan has been promised at least a walk-on part in the biggest club game in the world.
Back to the future
Banned for biting an opponent, vilified in the press, forced to watch his side make an impressive start to the season from the sidelines before finally, belatedly, joining their campaign in a match away to their biggest rivals.
Well, 2013-14 didn't turn out too bad did it Luis?